Talking Big Love: Part Two, continued
We gathered a few people together to see what they thought of the premiere episode of HBO's new series "Big Love." The edited comments below are excerpted from a panel comprised of activists who want the state to take a harder line against polygamy and ex-members of several
polygamous groups.
The second episode of "Big Love" airs tonight.
On relationships in plural marriages
Ronald Tucker, a former member of the Kingston group and son of former leader John Ortell Kingston: There were some real contrasts with the way things are in The Order, the Kingston group. They have a real tight rein on money.
The wife, with her check, she would have had to have gone to her husband to ask if she could spend that money because she would never have seen that check. It would have gone to the main account and she would have had to ask him for money.
You've got one gal who wants more and he's taking from the other one, if you were in the middle of that, can you imagine how stressful and awful that would be?
I never knew a family where a man didn't develop a favorite. There are a lot of them that would really try to be fair and equal, but they all picked up on it.
Even with me, there were times I drove one direction 50 m.p.h. and 70 m.p.h. the other direction. You had to build walls up around you because you couldn't share your whole life at any one place.
John Llewellyn, a former member of the Apostolic United Brethern and author of the critique Polygamy Under Attack: I lived it for 20 years and had three wives. There is competition between wives and a woman is not above using her sexuality if she is a cute girl to gain favor with the husband. There is always going to be competition to see who is going to be the dominate wife and who is going to be the favored
wife.
There is always contention or problems going on. I know from experience that much of the man's time is keeping peace. No matter how fair and equal in every respect [you try to be,] you're going to be accused of not being fair. That's just human nature.
Your personality changed when you were alone with each woman. We had three different locations at one time and then two. I was one guy here and another guy there. You crave some privacy of your own because you're always in demand. Not sexually, like [HBO shows] but your attention. It's not an easy life.
Fawn Broadbent, a teenager who several years ago left the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints: My whole life, I have never seen a happy family where I came from. Never.
Vicky Prunty, co-founder of Tapestry Against Polygamy who lived in two plural marriages: Looking into my families and the way we lived polygamy, we were shut down and we weren't expressive. Our emotions were very fictitious.
Whether you take polygamy in an isolated community or you take it into the mainstream, you're going to deal with the same issues, the same jealousies, the same whining, complaining wives and the husband who tries to stretch it so thin he becomes impotent.
polygamous groups.
The second episode of "Big Love" airs tonight.
On relationships in plural marriages
Ronald Tucker, a former member of the Kingston group and son of former leader John Ortell Kingston: There were some real contrasts with the way things are in The Order, the Kingston group. They have a real tight rein on money.
The wife, with her check, she would have had to have gone to her husband to ask if she could spend that money because she would never have seen that check. It would have gone to the main account and she would have had to ask him for money.
You've got one gal who wants more and he's taking from the other one, if you were in the middle of that, can you imagine how stressful and awful that would be?
I never knew a family where a man didn't develop a favorite. There are a lot of them that would really try to be fair and equal, but they all picked up on it.
Even with me, there were times I drove one direction 50 m.p.h. and 70 m.p.h. the other direction. You had to build walls up around you because you couldn't share your whole life at any one place.
John Llewellyn, a former member of the Apostolic United Brethern and author of the critique Polygamy Under Attack: I lived it for 20 years and had three wives. There is competition between wives and a woman is not above using her sexuality if she is a cute girl to gain favor with the husband. There is always going to be competition to see who is going to be the dominate wife and who is going to be the favored
wife.
There is always contention or problems going on. I know from experience that much of the man's time is keeping peace. No matter how fair and equal in every respect [you try to be,] you're going to be accused of not being fair. That's just human nature.
Your personality changed when you were alone with each woman. We had three different locations at one time and then two. I was one guy here and another guy there. You crave some privacy of your own because you're always in demand. Not sexually, like [HBO shows] but your attention. It's not an easy life.
Fawn Broadbent, a teenager who several years ago left the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints: My whole life, I have never seen a happy family where I came from. Never.
Vicky Prunty, co-founder of Tapestry Against Polygamy who lived in two plural marriages: Looking into my families and the way we lived polygamy, we were shut down and we weren't expressive. Our emotions were very fictitious.
Whether you take polygamy in an isolated community or you take it into the mainstream, you're going to deal with the same issues, the same jealousies, the same whining, complaining wives and the husband who tries to stretch it so thin he becomes impotent.
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