This past week has been a long and trying one.

I've been dealing with some major changes at work, juggling personal life stuff and just been struggling with the summer doldrums.

But I'm very proud of myself because I realized that I was headed in for some big stressors and an emotional time, and I took proactive steps to prevent myself from allowing food to be my comfort.

I made sure I always took the low-fat, lower-calorie option at every meal, and made sure that I really watched portions. I wasn't able to carve out any time for the gym this week, which I've missed terribly, but I worked really hard to stay on the correct path foodwise.

And, apparently, it paid off.

The number: 262.2.

I was so excited that I wrapped a towel around myself, opened the bathroom door and shouted out into the hallway that I had lost two full pounds this week. I was totally thrilled.

Even better, the week has helped me shrink the size of my stomach, so I haven't been getting as hungry throughout the day, and I've been eating less at meals.

I'm getting excited for a trip to Mount Rushmore I'm taking with my mom and two youngest sisters. We're leaving Sunday and returning Thursday, and we're staying at places where we're cooking our own food. I'm looking forward to planning out a healthy menu and having a ton of fun fishing, hiking, swimming and horseback riding.

That also means I won't have a weigh-in next week, but will update my weight again on July 15.

Onward and Downward!

I'm so sorry it's been so long since I've posted my weigh-in! I meant to get to it last week, even though it was a bad one.

That number: 266.8.

I knew that I had done very bad things in the two weeks leading up to that weigh-in, and a two-pound gain was the price.

But, I decided that I wasn't going to let one bad weigh-in pull me down. So, this past week, it's been a lot of swimming, some jogging and paying careful attention to what I'm eating.

The result: 264.2.

I know that's only about a half pound lost since June 5, but I'm just proud of myself for making the right decisions this past week instead of following my usual pattern of letting one bad weigh-in lead to another.

So, I hope that this good weigh-in leads to another good one next week. My goal is to be in the 250s by the middle of July, and I'm going to work hard to do it.

Onward and Downward!

It's been a hard week.

And, apparently, harder than even I realized.

I didn't really understand how difficult it had gotten until I found myself Saturday night square-shouldered against my Dad, being deeply impatient with him over some stupid dinner thing when I started really screaming and then just flat-out sobbing as I unleashed all the pent-up frustrations I've been feeling for the past several days.

I should have known something was wrong when every time I sat down to eat something healthy (which I did my best to do) I'd take about three bites and then push the plate away. Nothing was sounding appealing.

Then I found myself with a bottomless appetite for anything with sugar in it. I don't know that was really even cognizant of the all the stuff I was scarfing down over the week, just that I had an endless desire for it and no matter how much I ate, I didn't feel full or satisfied.

So, the Saturday-evening meltdown probably should have happened a lot earlier, and preferably not in the broadcast center of my family's home, where everyone got to listen to me rant and sob for five solid minutes.

But after I calmed down, I felt a lot better. I made peace with the troubles of the world, and finally accepted that some things change with or without our permission, and the only thing we get to choose is how to react to them.

Yes, I wish I would have reacted in a more pleasant manner all week, hitting the pool instead of the ice cream carton. And I wish that my default coping mechanism wasn't to find the unhealthiest thing in the room to eat when I'm stressed out.

But tonight, I'm going back into the pool. And hopefully tomorrow's weigh-in won't be atrocious, though I'm worried that it will be a nasty one. At least I caught myself after a week instead of letting it drag on longer.

Stressors will always be part of my life. I've just got to learn to handle them more appropriately.

I'm going to actively focus on hitting the gym to work out angst, and eating healthy to give myself the energy needed to battle through the next day.

And I learned that my body does have its way of letting me know I'm upset and trying to bury it: the next time I push away a plate of salad or grilled salmon, I'll know it's not just a sudden loss of appetite. It's my brain's way of telling me to work things out.

Onward and Downward!

First, my apologies for the delay in posting my weigh in. I got on the scale on Wednesday, but have been so busy that I haven't had five minutes to sit down and share it with everyone.

It was a good weigh-in.

The number: 264.8.

So, that means I've dropped 1.2 pounds in the past week, which I'm happy with.

I just hope the weight continues to peel off this week, too. I splashed boiling oil on the top of my right foot on Tuesday, and I have an enormous burn blister there, which is making it impossible to put on running shoes. But I do plan to hit the swimming pool and hope for the best.

Hopefully this obnoxious (and oftentimes painful) burn heals up quickly.

Onward and Downward!

This morning, I woke up early and went with my housemates to Liberty Park. We did a walk/jog around the park, which was good to get the sweat going. It actually felt better to jog than to walk quickly. Weird, I know.

I ran over to Smith's (which, by the way, is having a sale on a 10-pound sack of potatoes for $1.79) and grabbed some potatoes, carrots and barbecue sauce for dinner. I went home, and put chicken and the veggies in my crock pot, and I can't wait to get home to a hot meal.

After everything was set up and ready to go, I went to the scale. Yes, it fought with me a bit, but not nearly as much as yesterday's several-pound swings.

While the scale spit out some lower numbers, only one came up three times.

The number: 266.0.

OK, so a half pound in two weeks. Not a great thing, but I'm not letting it discourage me. I know that the pounds will continue melting off as I'm eating much less and much healthier and I'm working out every morning.

So, hopefully next week will be a bit kinder on the number, but I feel great about the choices I'm making and happy with how I'm physically feeling.

Onward and Downward!

This weekend made me wish I always had three-day weekends. I feel like I was able to pull my whole life together because I had one extra day to use however I wanted.

A bunch of my friends headed down to Moab this weekend, and I started out Friday a little bummed that I wasn't going to be joining them.

But, as I got into the pool Sunday morning at 24Hour Fitness, all that melted away. My goal was simple: swim a mile. I didn't care how long it took, I just wanted to do it. I thought I remembered that 72 lengths equaled a mile (it's actually 65 at that pool, but I didn't know that at the time), so I got in and went, not caring about my time.

I didn't stop once, and kept moving until I touched the wall at number 72, and looked at the clock. It took me 1 hour and 35 minutes.

I wondered if people who saw me through the big glass wall that lines one side of the pool thought I was swimming in Jell-O instead of water.

But I got out feeling great, and the swim killed my appetite for the day, which was great.

On Monday morning, I woke up and went back. I again swam 72 lengths, and finished in 1 hour and 25 minutes. I had incorporated the front crawl this time, something I didn't do the day before.

When I was a kid, I was terrified of the water. Well, not the water. A grate at the bottom of the pool under which, I was convinced, a monster lived. The pool at 24Hour Fitness does not have a grate, which is helpful. But my first few lengths, I was worried about timing my breathing and not making it the full 25 meters. But I did make it, and after that, I was able to blank out just as I do when doing backstroke or my modified breast stroke.

Again, my appetite was down all day, which was much needed after a week of trying out some delicious meals that were great deals at both Red Rock Brewing Company and Caffe Molise. I ate at both on my diet-days off over the past two weeks, but they were richer meals than I usually get, so I'm sure that will take some toll no matter how much I did my best to work around them.

This morning, I went on a quick walk around Liberty Park with my housemate, The Rox, and we're going again tomorrow for more laps and some jogging.

And all of this brings me to my scale, which couldn't make up its mind this morning. It kept bouncing all over the place, and I couldn't get it to settle down enough to give me the same reading three times. So, I'll get on again tomorrow, and let you know how it goes.

I'm hoping that all this moving, and not much eating, will pay off!

Onward and Downward!

Last night, I got a random text from a friend who I hadn't hung out with in a long time.

The first message: Do you have a Frisbee?

My response: No.

A couple hours later, another one popped up: Hey, let's shoot hoops.

I said OK, and at 9 p.m., I met him at an outdoor court tucked away here at the Gateway office building where I work and we started shooting around.

Mind you, I haven't handled a basketball in about two years. I think my shooting percentage was like 3 percent (and that's being deeply generous). I made at most a dozen baskets in two hours of shooting.

But, my horribly embarrassing shooting average helped keep me moving as I ran around the court, chasing down the ball after it rebounded off the backboard at crazy angles.

It was a great way to catch up with a friend and work up a good sweat. I had forgotten how many different muscles shooting a basketball uses, and the two hours whipped by. It was nice to incorporate movement into my day without thinking of it as a workout. I appreciated that my friend wanted to do something active rather than grab a cup of coffee to talk.

I've made good choices this week with food and with movement, and that reflected in my scale. It jumped around quite a bit this morning, going as high as 268 and as low as 265. I used my trusted technique of getting the same number three times in a row.

The number: 266.6.

I worry that the ominous reading means it was false, but I think that's just silly superstition getting in the way of my happiness at dropping nearly three pounds last week.

I'm so thrilled that the scale is again moving in the right direction, and I'm even happier that I'm continuing to make good choices, even in the face of bad temptations.

Here's to another week of horrible shots and healthy eating!

Onward and Downward!