Last one in the pool's a necrotizing fasciitis!
Two recent stories make it clear how disgusting it is to be an organism on this planet.
Exhibit A: A flesh-eating bacterium is on the loose in Utah. This puppy, with the sweet name necrotizing fasciitis, will chew away your skin down to the muscle.
For some, it can begin with something as simple as a cut on a finger. Most patients "don't necessarily remember significant trauma that could have served as the point of entry for the bacteria," a medical official says. Between 1992 and 2005, 17 percent of Utah patients with necrotizing fasciitis in their groin area died from the infection.How does one get this horror? "Generally, it's a consequence of bad luck," the health official says. And you thought your last trip to Wendover was bleak.
Exhibit B: While fasciitis roams the land, health officials have decided babies with poopy diapers are welcome back into Utah's public pools as part of a hard-fought compromise.
I'm glad to hear officials could find a middle ground between baby pool fun and a few thousand cases of cryptosporidium, a germ that makes folks — never accuse Crawler of not giving it to you straight — barf outta both ends.
This insidious bug apparently also causes memory loss in health officials. As the Tribune reports:
Utah had one of 2007's largest crypto outbreaks in the nation, with 1,949 crypto cases reported. To try to stem the illness, spread through fecal-oral contact, pools in most of the state barred children under 5 from late August to late September.Never fear, if there's another outbreak of cryptogodawfulium, officials say free-range babies will likely be banned from pools.
1 Comments:
Glen, you're hilarious. I should snag that headline for use on my MySpace page.
Funny, you'd think 1,949 crypto cases would be enough to keep dooky out of the pools. I guess the lawmakers like to be surrounded by poop, but maybe they have their own pools to hold their messes. I personally prefer clean water, but, hey, that's just me.
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