Village Vidiot: TV

Gee, you'd think it was the funeral of a sitting U.S. president who was assassinated.

But so far, CBS and E! will be carrying Tuesday's (July 7) funeral of Michael Jackson at the Staples Center in Los Angeles. The services begin at 11 a.m. Some 11,000 free tickets will be raffled off and another 6,500 will be given to fans who can watch it on the big screen at the Nokia Theatre across the street from the arena.

Meanwhile, the rest of us can watch it in the safety of our homes on the television set. But not me, I have to have my hair done that day.

Chances are, other networks will jump in for live wall-to-wall coverage of the service. Stay tuned if you care about this sort of thing. (I really must get my hair done that day, and I feel a cold coming on)

At this rate, I'm going to run out of headline ideas for the two Utah dancers on Fox's hit show, "So You Think You Can Dance." They keep advancing, and I keep struggling for ways to announce it.

In fact the two Utahns, Randi Evans, Orem, and Brandon Bryant, Salt Lake City, didn't even make the bottom three couples.

So here's another week in which I tell you they made it past another round. How do I say that? Oh what the heck, here ya go:

WARNING: SPOILERS!!

Finalists Karla Garcia and Vitolio Jeune were eliminated tonight on the summer hit SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE. Garcia, 24, is a Jazz/Contemporary dancer from Brooklyn, NY, and Jeune, 26, is a Contemporary dancer from Miami, FL. This week featured special performances by pop sensation Kelly Clarkson and professional dancers Desmond Richardson and Patricia Hachey.

The three couples who received the fewest votes after Wednesday’s performance show were: Karla Garcia and Vitolio Jeune; Kayla Radomski and Kupono Aweau; and Jeanine Mason and Phillip Chbeeb. After each of these six dancers performed solo routines, the judges eliminated Garcia and Jeune.

Here's a funny thought: Who will play Sen. Al Franken on "Saturday Night Live"?

Franken was a cast regular of "SNL" and a political comic with a sharp mind who has written many a skit for the late night sketch comedy show.

Most likely he will be spoofed on the show this upcoming season now that Franken is a senator from Minnesota. Here's what he told the Associated Press.

If "How I Met Your Mother" ever gets cancelled, Neil Patrick Harris can take on a job as awards host. Apparently, he's really good at it.

After successful gigs as hosts of the Tony Awards, the creative Emmy Awards, the TV Land awards, and the Writers Guild Awards, the Emmy people want Harris for the primetime Emmys.

Personally, I would want the Neil Patrick Harris of the "Harold & Kumar" movies, where he's snorting cocaine and groping people.

OK, I don't think it is too soon to go to the rooftops and scream, "STOP THE MICHAEL JACKSON NEWS!!"

It's been a week since the King of Pop has died and it's still non-stop coverage on all the 24-hour news networks. And CNN.com, which has become an embarrassment for Internet news, has put Jackson on the lead story of its homepage nearly every second since he passed.

Even the Brits are complaining about BBC going apes--t.

Um, there are other things going on in the world people. I'd even welcome a story on how firefighters save a cat from a tree. Time to move on.

And to kick off this new revolution of no Michael Jackson news, I'm not going to post his picture here. So there.

You know how some movie ideas were written on cocktail napkins? Here's one so small it was written on the fortune of a fortune cookie.

"Asteroids."

The smash video game of 30 years ago is being turned into a movie. Since the game had no plot, just a ship shooting space rocks, Hollywood executives will have to do something they hate to do - they'll actually have to come up with a plot.

"Aw, but the special effects will be cool," you say. Yeah, that's what a lot of people probably said about the new "Transformers" movie until they actually dished out $10 and saw it.

By the way, did these executives who came up with the idea of turning a video game into a movie see other movies based on video games? Um, not the greatest track record. What a bunch of idiots.

Are these dancing moms from Utah on Tuesday night's (June 30) episode of "America's Got Talent" the next Susan Boyle?

Uh. . .no. That's a definite no. Absolutely not. Never. Not a chance. I don't think so.

But these five women who originated from the Beehive State (only one still lives here) and performed some kind of Irish dancing/tap dancing number were not half bad in terms of technique. Though their act did seem a little cheesy.

Doesn't matter what I think, however. The three judges put them through to Las Vegas. Here's their act in glorious Intertubes video.

If these things come in threes, why are we on our fifth in the last month?

Death has now claimed well-known television personality and "Streets of San Francisco" co-star Karl Malden. He was 97. This after Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson and pitchman Billy Mays all died.

The obituary in the Los Angeles Times did not mention where he passed away or from what. He died Wednesday (July 1).

Malden also was known at the celebrity spokesman for American Express and for his phrase: "Don't leave home without it." He also won a supporting-actor Oscar for his role as Mitch in "A Streecar Named Desire."

But I will remember him - and that wonderful nose of his - for his role as Gen. Omar Bradley in the Oscar-winning "Patton."