Village Vidiot: TV

Oprah Winfrey, who is conquering the world piece by piece, may be quitting her current syndicated show to start her own network, the Oprah Winfrey Network (of course it will have her name in it).

Deadline Hollywood's Nikke Finke is reporting that Oprah will begin moving to her OWN empire in Los Angeles, which is expected to go into 70 million homes in replace of the Discovery Health channel.

Sources close to the TV diva say "that Discovery Communications chief David Zaslav has demanded that Oprah "move it or lose it" -- move her talk show to OWN, or risk losing the Oprah Winfrey Network altogether. I've learned that in coming days Winfrey and Discovery will issue a press release announcing OWN's on-air launch for the start of 2011."

Here's great news:

Comedy Central, home of "The Daily Show" and "The Colbert Report," has teamed with the very funny satirical news people, The Onion, to create a new scripted television show based on The Onion Sports Network.

From a release issued Thursday (Nov. 5):

The as-yet untitled series will take on the whole universe of modern sports – teams, players, leagues, sycophantic fans, ridiculous products and over-hyped sports coverage – with an eye towards appealing to sports fanatics and more casual fans, as well as long-time followers of The Onion and The Onion News Network.

Here's video of the funny network.

Next week, the world will come to an end, sorta, in the disaster epic "2012" when it's released in movie theaters.

The movie hasn't even opened yet - it could even bomb at the box office - but producer/director Roland Emmerich already is talking a sequel of sorts for a new television series.

“The plan is that it is 2013 and it’s about what happens after the disaster," he told Entertainment Weekly. "It is about the resettling of Earth. That is very, very fascinating."

Really?? Isn't it a lot more fun to blow stuff up than to put it back together, especially when you're talking about what is really just popcorn entertainment?

Just to show you that university professors really need to get out more and stop wasting taxpayer dollars on useless research, a pair of academics at the University of Edinburgh in Scotland claim that Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer could not possibly be male because male reindeer shed their antlers before Christmas.

One of the professors "suggested if Rudolph was not a female then he may have been a eunuch. When a male reindeer is castrated it stops the process of casting the antlers in the winter time, and they turn into being more like females," according to a story in England's Telegraph.

He added: "Rudolph could be a castrated male, or a female. I think it's nicest to think that Rudolph was a female!"

OK, that's way too much information. But if Rudolph's a female and he, er, she had the hots for the cute little reindeer Clarice, that means Rudolph's gay. Just try and catch those two kissing on the Salt Lake City Mormon Temple grounds.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints let a film crew from "The Colbert Report" onto the grounds of the Salt Lake City Temple to make a comedy sketch. What was the church thinking?

The result is this hilarious "Nailed 'Em" segment for Tuesday's episode that is downright hilarious, which takes shots at the LDS Church for the July 9 incident involving Derek Jones and Matt Aune kissing each other and getting arrested.

I wrote a story about the filming of the segment that you can read here.

Here's the sketch in all its video glory.

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Nailed 'Em - Mormon Church Trespassing
www.colbertnation.com</a>
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor U.S. Speedskating

Honestly, do we really need another dance show? Do we?

ABC thinks we do. The network is going to air "Let's Dance," a new celebrity-driven dance competition series.

Comic Kathy Griffin will host the show, which premieres Nov. 23 on KTVX Channel 4. "Celebrities," and by that we really mean D-list celebs (so Griffin will feel at home here), will take the stage and pay homage to famous dances, according to TV Guide.

No professional dancers will be involved, so I would imagine the dancing is going to be awful. They shoot horses don't they?

In a new interview with Jay Leno, Broadcasting & Cable gets an interesting look at a man who is taking negative criticism in stride.

His "The Jay Leno Show" has been a big disappointment ratings-wise, but Leno is determined to see it through for as long as NBC wants him to. He believes that it takes time for the ratings to level up, and he's prepared to take all the criticism necessary until that happens.

"I've been through this a number of times. I took over from Johnny [Carson], 'You stink, you suck, we hate you.' Then you go along and you're great; from last January to May, I was a genius. I get it, I understand how it works. I really don't take anything too personally."

Read the whole interview here. It's a pretty fascinating examination of a television personality under fire.

Even though he was last seen being stabbed by his estranged and somewhat crazy wife at the end of the sixth cycle, President Logan returns to "24" for the eighth season when it premieres in January.

From Fox's press release:

The disgraced former President Logan was last seen after being shockingly stabbed by First Lady MARTHA LOGAN (Jean Smart) in Season Six. Itzin’s return to 24 will bring together the series’ two Emmy-nominated “presidents” for the first time when sitting President ALLISON TAYLOR (Emmy Award winner Cherry Jones) reluctantly enlists Logan to assist with an escalating international diplomatic crisis.

When asked about this on-screen pairing, 24 executive producer Howard Gordon said, “The opportunity for these two remarkable actors to share the stage was simply too compelling to pass up."

Season Eight resets in New York City where a retired JACK BAUER (Sutherland) is unwillingly drawn back into the intense action after learning of a plot to assassinate Middle Eastern peace-keeping leader OMAR HASSAN (Anil Kapoor). Meanwhile, RENEE WALKER (Annie Wersching) and CHLOE O’BRIAN (Mary Lynn Rajskub) return alongside CTU newcomers DANA WALSH (Katee Sackhoff), BRIAN HASTINGS (Mykelti Williamson) and COLE ORTIZ (Freddie Prinze Jr.).

The show returns Jan. 17 and 18 on KSTU Channel 13.

Here's a sneak peek at the new season: